Warning!!! Long, boring rant ahead!!!
Frustrating day at school today. Nope, it wasn’t the kids.
They were great, actually. The district superintendent (my kids
have been calling him the supernintendo 
)
is coming for a visit tomorrow, so it’s time for the dog and pony
show. I played slavedriver all day today trying to get everything
done. It was a very chaotic day, but the kids were very flexible
and cooperative. Even my little Jeff Spicoli reined it in today.
What was frustrating was a meeting I had with my principal, the school
psychologist, and the asst. superintendent in charge of special
ed. I HATE these meetings because I have to sit with a bunch of
people who act like they know my student better than I do. No
matter that they’ve met him once or twice or never at all and I spend
six hours a day with the kid!
When
I walked in they had already started the meeting and had determined
that he has Asperger’s Syndrome. Well, I’ve spent a year with a
student with Asperger’s and consequently done my share of research, and
I know that “Sam” does not have Asperger’s. Anticipating this
meeting and already having my own theory, I spent part of my weekend
researching on the internet and discovered that Sam is practically the
poster child for Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder. Every
single characteristic applied to him. So, I presented my
theory, backed up with ample evidence, and then followed it by my
speech about how, actually, the diagnosis is not really important to
me. I only see it as a tool in finding ways to help Sam.
But do they listen? No, of course not. What do I
know?
Instead,
they decide that Sam’s strange behaviors must be due to abuse. I
am at this point flabbergasted to see my principal readily agreeing
with them. Is this the same man who, just a few months ago when I
was seeking help for Sam, was trying to convince me that he exhibited
these behaviors because he was spoiled and babied at home? So
which is it? Spoiled or abused? I wanted to scream.
These are some of the nicest parents I have met. They bend over
backwards to do whatever we suggest might help Sam. They have
family game night, spend all kinds of time with him on his homework,
seek out advice and help wherever they can find it, and have a daughter
who has none of these idiosyncracies that Sam exhibits.
Yes,
they do have high expectations … like almost every Asian parent I’ve
ever met. I can see how those expectations might unintentionally
exacerbate a problem like Sam’s, but is that abuse? So, the
outcome of the meeting was to get permission to assess Sam (that’s good
news) and to try to find parenting classes for two of the best parents
I’ve ever met. Oh, and of course, when I asked about what
services would be available if he did qualify, they said that most
likely counseling wouldn’t help him and that he would need meds. 
Despite my urge to pull my hair out (or theirs) I just kept my mouth shut and decided to cross that bridge when I come to it.
12 hours later and still seething! 
Quote of the Day:
Here’s to the kids who
are different,
The kids who don’t always
get A’s.
The kids who have ears
twice the size of their peers,
And noses that go on for
days.
Here’s to the kids who
are different,
The kids they call crazy
and dumb.
The kids who aren’t cute
and don’t give a hoot,
Who dance to a different
drum.
Here’s to the kids who
are different,
The kids with the mischievous
streak.
For when they have grown,
As history’s shown,
It’s their difference that
makes them unique.
–Digby Wolfe
Poisoned by Fairy Tales 
I started to say you’ve got to be kidding but I know your not. If you decide to pass on the “experts” suggestions you will have a strong ally in this kids parents. My daughter has o/c it went undiagnosed throughout her childhood and youth and we never knew how truly anxious she was until she became an adult. I believe it would be cruel not to go forward with what you know. And the thought of him being medicated for something he doesn’t have is sad and frightening. Stick to what you know to be true, it sounds like you are the only advocate that this child and his parents have. I can sure understand why your seething, I think I’ll go do a little seething of my own on your behalf.
is the whole world medicated…okay i get they are medicating kids for the excuse of teaching them now or not getting what to do with the ones that dont fit the freakin mold but i look on tv and wonder man every 30 seconds it is a drug for this and that and studies for new ones in case you got a stomach ache or horrors not an outgoing person….wait is that called being shy…so i would have been medicated if i was in grade school now for being shy…man and individuality is that like found in some kind of new candy bar? ahh schools are really out of their minds and we give them the money to play at it…it is reall ashame…hope your day is better…<3
abuse? really? hmm? i understand your frustration. medication? no counseling? hmm? is there testing for ocd? sorry my teacher friend.
how coincidental! Last night on Boston Legal– a lawyer was diagnosed with Asperger’s… very interesting syndrome.
and Supernintendo– haha… only out of the mouths of babes…
It is so obvious to me how much you love your job– even when things are not going well… Teachers like you are my heroes!
That’s messed up. Stand your ground!
I hope that your principal figures out that what this child needs is support, which he already seems to get from home. It is sad that they are suggesting the parents actually take parenting classes…I know some parents out there who could use it, but in their case, that is ridiculous! I hope things turn out well for Sam and you!