We didn’t
time our Netflix return very well this week, so no movie this
weekend.  Instead we  decided to watch some of the Oprah
collection Toshi gave me for Christmas. 









On the first disc there was
a compilation of some of the stories that had most moved Oprah over the
years.  Wow … I boohooed through the whole thing!  The
stories were so amazing and inspirational and helped me get some fresh
perspective.  I am so blessed; I really am.  It always amazes
me how strong people can be in the face of adversity; in many cases, I
think they probably even surprise themselves with the strength and
courage they manage to find in times of trouble.

then I can quit my griping about grandma’s party and
be grateful for all of my many blessings.  And although it may
sound corny,  you number among those blessings.  Thank you
for letting me bend your ears (or rather, your eyes ), for your words of encouragement, and for a more-than-occasional guffaw.  




Quote of the Day:

People are like stained-glass windows.  They sparkle and shine when the
sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed
only if there is light from within.  ~Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

Before I
tell you the latest news, I need to tell you a bit about my
grandma.  As I’ve written before, my grandma is actually my
stepgrandma.  She and my grandpa got married when she was about
65.  It was her first marriage.  My grandpa passed away a few
years later, and she is now the only grandparent I have. 



My grandma is a not a
sweet, soft, cookie-baking type of grandma.  She’s the type of
grandma who rewraps gifts you’ve given her and raffles them at a Christmas
party where you’re in attendance … the type of grandma that invites
you to said party only to exploit you as kitchen help and waitstaff, making you eat in the kitchen …
the type of grandma who invites you to tea to dig for dirt on your
siblings … the kind of grandma who talks about “coloreds” taking over
the world … the type of grandma who prays that you will overcome all
of your shortcomings (listed aloud) in the prayer before Easter
dinner.  I do love my grandma, and I know she loves us. 
However, sometimes she can be so self-centered and self-righteous …
and just damn annoying.



So now that you’ve had a
little introduction, maybe I don’t really need to explain why I wasn’t
so excited about attending the party to celebrate her newly-acquired
citizenship.  Yes, the one that requires that attendees wear
costumes from their native country.  Yay.   
Well, I agreed to go to the party because I felt badly for her …
since the rest of my family bailed.  I just figured I would go
there, hobnob with the prayer group ladies for a few minutes, and then
make a quick exit. 



Well, last night grandma
called.  She asked if I could help her with a couple of things for
the party.  Of course, this is when my can’t-say-no-itis kicked
in.  I agreed to help her, and then she laid the details on
me.  The party is at 2pm, but she wants me to get to her house at
9am and run several errands with her and then help get the party set
up.  Then during the party she wants me to be in charge of the
guest book, meaning that my ENTIRE day would be taken up by her
party.  You need to know here that this woman regularly drives
herself all the way to Canada from LA … so it’s not like she needs a
driver.  In fact, she’s planning to do the driving … which is
just one more reason that I don’t want to go.  The woman drives
like she’s on a soap opera … you know … the constant little back
and forth action with the steering wheel even though she’s traveling in a straight line.



Anyway, I got off the
phone, cried, and then got in a fight with Toshi.  In trying to
console me, he said, “I love you, but sometimes you are just too
nice.  You let people take advantage of you.”  Hello? 
Ahem … look who’s talking, Mr. Wouldn’t Still Be Here If I Weren’t So
Nice!  So then I called to whine to my mom because I know she can
relate since she’s the one I inherited the can’t-say-no-itis from in
the first place.  She then got my sisters together to come up with
a good excuse to get me off the hook. 



But I just don’t want to
lie … I know I have to be a big girl and face this.  All day
I’ve been planning my speech.  “Grandma, I have testing and open
house coming up and have a million things to do.  I have to get my
old car smogged so I can transfer the registration, and I need to
prepare the house for Toshi’s friend who is coming to stay next
week.  You can have two hours of my time.  Use them as you
wish.  I can run errands for two hours, go to the party for two
hours, or split the time, but two hours is my limit.” 



Right before dinner, I
worked up my nerve, disabled the caller ID, and made the call (planning
to hang up if it wasn’t the answering machine ). 
Well, it was busy, so I know she’s home.  I guess I’m really going
to have to be a grown up and talk to her live … dammit.  Really,
if I do this, it will be a big step for me, second only to the moment I
finally came to the conclusion that I don’t have to answer the phone
unless I feel like it. 

Who can turn the world on with her smile?


Who can take a nothing day, and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile?


Well it’s you girl, and you should know it


With each glance and every little movement you show it




Love is all around, no need to waste it


You can have a town, why don’t you take it


You’re gonna make it after all


You’re gonna make it after all
            
              
              
           
      –Mary Tyler Moore theme song

Ah,
I’m having a Mary moment; if I were wearing a cap, I’d whirl around and
toss it in the air right about now.  Called grandma, stood my
ground, and we compromised.  She was a little huffy, but she’ll
get over it.  I’m going to join her on her errands but take my own
car.  That way I can leave the party whenever I feel I need to
go.  Oh, and it starts at 11am, not 2pm.  I can’t tell you
how relieved I am to not have to spend my whole Saturday doing the dog
and pony show.  Yay for me!  I actually said no and lived to
tell about it.

Go, Kelly!

It’s your birthday!

No, it’s not …

It’s the day you said no to grandma!

    Okay, so the last line isn’t that catchy, but I’m still feelin’ it.

It’s a dark, dark day …

The store says they are going to give us other “special” deals instead,
but thus far, I have been witness to no such “special” deals. 
Hmpf …

Picture this ….



It’s 2:10, school is over
at 2:40, and we’re in the middle of a writing lesson.  Suddenly in
walks a mom bringing along a full-fledged birthday party.  I was
of the understanding that she was planning to drop a little something
off in the afternoon, so I’m envisioning cupcakes or cookies or chips
and punch.  But NO … she walks in with fried chicken, eggrolls,
a cake (with candles, of course), and cans of root beer … and of
course no forks, no plates, no knife, no napkins, no matches. 
Fried chicken?   
And the root beer got all the kids in a panic because most of them had
never heard it before and thought it was actually beer.  “Miss G.,
I don’t want to be impolite, but I can’t drink beer.”



Aiya!  Somehow she and
I managed to get it all worked out, even though she only speaks
Vietnamese.  I scrounged through the cupboards and managed to
piece together most of what we needed … except for a knife and
matches because … hello? … what third grade classroom comes
equipped with knives and matches?   
She tracked down the custodian who happened to have a lighter, and we
all sang along to the fabulous musical candle. 



Now, I have to say that it
was all worth it to see Michael so happy.  He lives with mom,
brother, and grandma, and most of the time he is stuck at home with
grandma who doesn’t drive, meaning that he never goes anywhere or does
anything special.  And he is the sweetest kid you could ever hope
to meet.  But I do wonder if he couldn’t have been just as happy
without the fried chicken. 



Call me a party pooper, but
next year I think I’ll send out a note at the beginning of the year
that stipulates that all birthday treats must come in the form of
something I can literally toss to each child … a bag of chips, a
popsicle, a juice box, a goody bag. 



First order of business
tomorrow will be wiping down the greasy, sticky desks and replacing the
air freshener, since my room currently smells like a combination of KFC
and sweaty kids.  Yum.

Oh,
and I neglected to mention that since the class met one of their class
goals for the month, they got to select a reward and picked … what
else? … banana splits!  So tomorrow afternoon is their banana
split party.  Good thing they got an extra P.E. session from the
principal on Monday for doing all of their spring break homework, huh?

The dream begins with a teacher who believes in you, who tugs and
pushes and leads you to the next plateau, sometimes poking you with a
sharp stick called “truth.”  ~Dan Rather

Well, my
spring break is coming to an end … and a little quicker than I
expected because I realized today that I had forgotten all about report
cards that are due on Monday. 



We never got around to
doing the flooring, but I do have other exciting news.  I finally
bought my new car on Tuesday!  It’s a RAV4 with all the bells and
whistles and a pricetag to match.  It is by far the most
extravagant/frivolous purchase I have ever made, and I don’t think it
has completely sunken in yet.   I have occasional flashes of
wondering how many people I could feed or how many countries I could
travel through on that money.   
And I’m still white knuckling it when I drive and parking in the most
remote corner of the parking lot;  I’m almost tempted to put the
first scratch on it myself … just to get it over with.

In other news, our house is now almost completely clean.   
We had my father, stepmom, and “uncle” over for dinner last
night.  Having company is always the surest way to a clean
house.  I say “almost” completely clean because much of the mess
migrated into the bedroom for the time being.  Once that is sorted
out, I’m sure a new mess will have developed in some other part of the
house.  I’m not sure if completely clean is even a realistic
possibility around here.  My stepmom is hiring a housecleaner for
one day because she says she just once wants to know what it’s like to
have the whole house clean at one time. 



My sister also cut and colored my hair yesterday.  I was there for more than 3 hours!   
I know that a lot of women find such “pampering” relaxing, but if I
could have the whole thing done in about five minutes, I would be a
happy camper.  And because my hairstylist is also my little
sister, there’s only so much dishing we can manage … we run out of
material after about twenty minutes.   But, I like my hair
color and the cut … unfortunately, the highlights are a little
brassy.  My sis says she just needs to put some toner on it. 
How long is that gonna take?  Maybe I’ll just live with the yellow
stripes. 



Today I went to school to
clean up a little bit and drop off all of the school stuff that had
accumulated in my old car.  Then we went to the movies.  It
was great; matinee price and almost nobody else in the theater. 
We saw “Take the Lead”, Antonio Banderas’ ballroom dance movie. 
It was Toshi’s choice, if you can believe that!  Slim pickins
these days at the theater.  (On a side note, am I the only one who
thinks Antonio seems gay?)  The movie was okay … a little Coach
Carter meets Dangerous Minds meets The Substitute meets Sister
Act.  You know the genre … outsider comes in and in a matter of
a couple weeks completely turns the toughest kids in school
around.  Sloppy editing, a few totally laughable “teaching”
scenes, and pretty shallow character development … but fluffily
entertaining nonetheless.



Tomorrow we are going to
the outlet mall to return some jeans Toshi bought that are too small
and then off to Santa Barbara for a trip to the zoo, walk on the pier,
and window shopping on State Street … giving Carbaby her first
workout.   

If
your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door, greet him
with, “Who could have done this? We have no enemies.” 
           
           
           
           
           
                 
–Phyllis Diller

Happens every time … I start out cleaning and end up sitting on the
floor surrounded by old photos, letters, essays, ticket stubs … the
wonderful debris of memory.  And then, of course, I don’t get
anything done. 

It’s so interesting to see through the eyes of the person I am now the
person I once was. What I most often end up concluding is that I’ve
always been my own worst critic.  Rereading old essays fifteen years
later, I discover that they’re much better than I thought they were
when I was struggling through a third or fourth draft trying just to
make them passable.  Looking at old pictures, I see
that I wasn’t as chubby or as dorky as I felt at the time they were
taken.  It gives me hope that maybe, just maybe, I’m somehow a
better person now than I’m giving myself credit for … that perhaps
when I look back at this time ten or twenty years from now I’ll
discover that all the things I criticized myself for weren’t as serious
as I made them out to be. 

One can hope …

Quote of the Day:



“Looking
back you realize that a very special person passed briefly through your
life — and it was you.  It is not too late to find that person
again.”

   
              
              
              
              
               
      –Robert Brault

Feeling so much better today … still not 100% but at least no fever.  Thank you for the get well wishes. 

Well, gee, on that uplifting note, I wish all of you a wonderful Easter!

Okay — so
things didn’t go as planned.  About three hours into my vacation,
Toshi and I were at Old Navy when suddenly I felt totally sick … no
strength and uncontrollable chills.  We went home and I curled up
with the heating pad, trying to get warm.  And then a few minutes
later, I had a temperature of 103 degrees.  So, here I am in bed
… current temp. is 102 despite tylenol and my new best friend the big
blue ice that Toshi wrapped in a pillowcase for me.  I guess the
silver lining is that at least I don’t have to make sub plans. 



It’s strange … no sore
throat, no nausea, nothing … just this horrible fever and all the
accompanying aches.  Weird.  Oh, and crying … how could I
leave that out … crying because I can’t peel the lid off the
applesauce, can’t untie the knot in the pillowcase, can’t go to the
store for jello.



For
Indigolady: yes, I can relate to you coming home and suddenly feeling
so sick.  I think sometimes we run on adrenaline and our bodies
are kind enough to wait until it’s convenient to break down.  This
is not the first time this has happened to me … my body always waits
for vacations to get sick.  Anyway, I’m so glad you were able to
enjoy your trip and can’t wait for pics.  Your postcard has been
the highlight of my vacation!  


Quote of the Day (hopefully not quote of the week):

Sickness comes on horseback but departs on foot.  ~Dutch Proverb

Woohoo!  Spring
break has begun!  Let the partying commence … right after I take a
good long nap, clean my house, go grocery shopping, desludge the
fishies, finish my report cards, send my tax return … 

Speaking of taxes, I finished my taxes and was pleasantly surprised to
find that my refund was much larger than I expected … larger to the
point that I double and triple checked it.  I was practically
jumping for joy and so grateful to the IRS until I realized, “Hey, wait
a minute!  It’s my own money that they’re giving back to me …
not some kind of gift.  They’ve been earning interest on my money
all year long!”    Hmpf!

Quotes of the day:




The wages of sin are death, but after they take the taxes out, it’s more like a tired feeling, really.  ~Paula Poundstone

I’m
proud to pay taxes in the United States; the only thing is, I could be
just as proud for half the money.  ~Arthur Godfrey